Look, I love my goldfish. Maybe a little too much. But can you blame me? They’re round, they’re adorable, and they have the personality of a confused potato—what’s not to love?
So naturally, one day, I had a thought:
“What if I made my goldfish into a plushy?”
At first, it seemed ridiculous. Who would want a huggable, soft, stuffed version of a fish? Fish are wet. Plushies are not wet. The two should not mix. And yet…
Goldfish have that perfect cartoonish look already. The chubby body, the oversized eyes, the weirdly dramatic flowing fins—it’s practically begging to be turned into a cuddly, marketable masterpiece.
So, I did it.
Step 1: The Design Phase
I sketched out my fish. At first, it looked cursed. Like, truly horrifying. The kind of thing that would haunt an aquarium’s nightmares. But after several revisions (and maybe some emotional breakdowns), I finally got it:
The perfect, squishy, derpy, and slightly too round goldfish plush.
Step 2: Finding a Manufacturer
This was wild. I had no idea how to actually make a plushy, so I just started emailing manufacturers like:
“Hey, I have this incredibly important and totally serious business inquiry… Can you turn my goldfish into a plushy?”
Some ignored me. Some laughed. One asked if I was okay. But eventually, I found The One.
After some back and forth, some sample testing (and one horrifying prototype that looked like an inflatable beach ball with eyes), we finally had it:
The ultimate goldfish plush.
Step 3: The Internet Loses Its Mind
I casually posted the plush online, thinking maybe a few people would be interested. I was wrong.
People went FERAL. Comments like:
- “I NEED THIS IMMEDIATELY.”
- “SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY.”
- “I don’t even own a fish, but I require this.”
And before I knew it? Boom. Sold out.
People were out here fighting for plush goldfish like it was a limited-edition sneaker drop. It was glorious.
Step 4: Realizing I Accidentally Started a Business
Now, I’m sitting here, surrounded by mountains of plush goldfish, running a full-on goldfish plush empire.
All because one day, I looked at my fish and thought: Yeah, that should be stuffed and sold to the masses.
And honestly? No regrets.
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